Week 3 - Saturday/Sunday

     This weekend sucked. A lot. But no worries – it’s much better now!

     Saturday morning my squad took a little trip to the Shoppette, where I bought some laundry detergent and withdrew $200 from my checking account for my class dues (still have to pay $150 more in June!). I would say that it’s been nice to save some money while I’ve been in training, but I’m trying to pay off my car, so no saving for me. Second Lieutenant pay will be SOOO nice in a couple months.

     Saturday afternoon, we took our required knowledge test (over Troop Leading Procedures & Military Aspects of Terrain). We also watched the first episode of Band of Brothers with our duty trainer as a “training video”. It was more like he wanted to keep us busy without irritating us too much. Then, he released us to what I THOUGHT was personal time. Apparently not. Around 19:30, he came upstairs and busted about 35 people for being on the internet. One of those people was me – I was actually watching “We Were Soldiers” on iTunes, but clearly not studying. Anyways, I got stuck with a counseling statement and probably a Class II write-up (I will find out Monday). Boo hoo for me, right? Next time, I will definitely confirm it’s personal time before I break my computer or cell phone out. One text message, Facebook post, or movie scene is not worth getting recycled for!

     On the flip side, I had a glorious morning at church. I think the service was planned just for me. Since I had spent most of the prior night feeling down on myself, I really needed a pick-me-up. We sang “Better is One Day”, which is one of my favorite worship songs, and it reminded me that the struggles I deal with in this life will not matter in the end. I will always, always have that “one day” to look forward to and not be afraid of.

     So, in conclusion, I learned to let go this weekend. Let go of things you cannot control. It’s not worth the stress. Don’t forget to pray, either. And eat peanut butter cookies at church. 

P.S. Happy Mother's Day, Mama!

Better is One Day:

How lovely is your dwelling place, Oh Lord Almighty

For my soul longs and even faints for you

Oh here my heart is satisfied within your presence

I sing beneath the shadow of your wings

Better is one day in your courts, better is one day in your house,

Better is one day in your courts than thousands elsewhere

One thing I ask, and I would seek, to see your beauty

To find you in the place your glory dwells

One thing I ask, and I would seek, to see your beauty

To find you in the place your glory dwells

My heart and flesh cry out to you the living God

Your Spirit's water to my soul, I've tasted and I've seen

Come once again to me

I will draw near to You, I will draw near to You

Better is one day in your courts, better is one day in your house,
Better is one day in your courts than thousands elsewhere

Week 3 - Thursday/Friday

     It’s almost the weekend!!! The last two days have been very stressful, but very rewarding. On Thursday morning, we completed the 3-mile (which was actually 3.3 mi because the track is 1.1 mi apparently) release run. My original goal was to finish in under 27:00, but I ended up completing the run in 24:20. When you break it down, my average pace was 7:22. Holy crap, I didn’t think I had it in me! The first mile was easy and fast, but around the 1.5 mile mark, I hit a wall for about a half mile. My third mile was great – I sprinted the last quarter to the finish line. Seeing how fast I ran, I know I will be able to max out my run time for the next APFT (Army physical fitness test). Now I just have to work on my sit-ups and I will be able to get at least a 300/300! Maybe by the end of OCS, I’ll be on the extended scale.

     The rest of the day Thursday was spent in la-la land. Apparently we had a couple classes on leadership and personnel management, but I can’t recall learning a whole lot. After dinner chow, I went to Bible study at the Airborne chapel, then came back to crank out my Constitution paper in the hour before lights out.

     This morning my platoon did simple stretching for PT in light of the infamous Bolton Obstacle Course this afternoon. Bolton was such a blast! We did 12 obstacles today that included rope climbs, balancing logs, monkey bars, and the Weaver. The Weaver is basically like an A-frame ladder in which you have to go under one rung and over the next until you reach the other side of the ladder. Basically, you get really bruised up and wear your arms out.

(marching to Bolton - I'm second from the right)

(getting ready to do "6 vaults" - I'm second from the left)

 

(me jumping over a "vault" - we weren't allowed to touch the vaults with anything except our hands)

(putting my gloves on to go down the inverted rope commando style - I was the fastest one all day!)

(shaking the sand out from the low crawl pit)

(my roommate, Nicole, prepping to go down the inverted rope)

(my platoon getting ready to put on a skit for the company - we made a Cera Sport commercial)

(working my way across a spinning metal bar about 12 feet in the air)

(my squad, from left to right - Michalak, Robertson, Nerstad, Sproul, Sergio Garcia, Jackman, Faure, me, Freeman, and Dago Garcia)

     Ironically, my only injury today came from me tripping over a sprinkler on the way to lunch chow. I definitely ate some dirt and scraped my knee up, but will hopefully survive to live another day. Tonight is basically a free night since we’ve got all of our tests out of the way – I’m just trying to get my locker cleaned up and my laundry done since I’ve had absolutely no time this past week. This weekend should be pretty chill, and I’m definitely needing the muscle recovery. Anyways, stay tuned for a post on Sunday!

Week 3 - Wednesday

     We lost our first male today, but this news didn’t come as a surprise to me. The male who was recycled has been struggling a lot with PT, leadership, and academics. To struggle in all three categories puts you on the cadre’s radar for a potential recycle. The tip for staying here is to simply do your best, and to not just “slide by” doing the bare minimum. Even if you were to get recycled, at least you can say you gave it your all.

     I went to the CTMC (Consolidated Troop Medical Center (Clinic?)) this morning to have a doctor look at my skin. Ever since I left for Basic Training, my skin has been taking the brunt of the stress and crazy hormone levels. So, the doctor gave me a really strong benzoyl peroxide wash and a bunch of retin-a and clindamycin creams as well as an oral antibiotic. I’ve got quite the cocktail going, and I really hope it works because, 1. it’s painful, and 2. it’s embarrassing!

     Obviously I’m not here to impress anybody, but it’s hard to build inner confidence when your outward appearance makes you feel like crap. Going from long, thick hair with feminine clothes and make-up to short, messy hair and ACUs is a drastic change. I’ve realized lately how much I used to use my hair, clothes, and make-up as a crutch. Since I’ve been here, I’ve had to rely on my other characteristics, like my humor, integrity, and adventurous spirit, in order to build confidence. My new-found confidence is much more permanent than any sort of materialistic front I’ve put on in my “former life”. Still, I find myself trying to convince people (mostly myself) that I AM feminine and that I DO care about my appearance. But as time goes by here, I start to care less about the tangibles, and more about the intangibles. It’s like getting to know yourself all over again – I had to start at the very beginning, the very pit of myself. Now I know that even if my hair falls out and I look like a leper, I still have the ability to survive and thrive in this world.

     But enough with the mushy stuff. Tomorrow morning we have our first release run. Basically, they take us to the track (which is a 1-mile track) and they start everybody at the same time. The females have to complete 3 laps in 29:15. Next week, we have to complete 4 laps in 38:00, and the week after that we have to complete 5 laps in 46:15. If you take the time to do the math, you’ll see that our pace gradually gets faster. Yeah, pretty funny, right? Nope. Seriously guys, if I can get through that 5-mile release run with my tendons acting up, I will cry big, happy crocodile tears! You’ll see pictures of me crossing the finish line drenched in sweat and tears. It will be such a wonderful day.

     For now though, I just have to get through tomorrow. I’m saving my stress about the 5-mile run for later. I simply don’t have the energy to stress about multiple things at once. Plus, I have to write a 1000-word essay tonight about how the Constitution relates to being an Army officer. Speaking of that, I should probably get started…

Week 3 - Monday/Tuesday

     From a horrible case of the Mondays to a surprisingly refreshing Tuesday, I feel all over the place:

     Monday morning started out rough with an ability group run. My Achilles just can’t seem to keep up with the rest of my body, and the pain is agonizing. I’m so frustrated and scared that I may be held back because of this chronic injury. My ability group didn’t do much more work than we did last week (3 miles of jogging, 1 mile of sprint intervals, and 30 minutes of stairs), but my body begs to differ. At this point, I just don’t know what to do about the pain. There’s only so much ibuprofen I can take, and stretching doesn’t help at all. Please, please, please, if you are reading this, send some prayers up for me. I want to complete this course, and I’ve given up far too much to not finish.

     For the rest of the day Monday, we had classes on leadership & ethics. For seven. freaking. hours. Yeah, you read that right.

     Monday night was very…enlightening. Nicole and I went down to SFC Harris’s office to file some paperwork, and we ended up having a pretty long conversation with one of the recent OCS graduates. She told us how the company is trying to weed the “weak” candidates out by putting them in leadership positions. We just found out who the new squad leaders were that morning, and it broke my heart to know that they might be leaving us soon. Apparently they were the people who were ranked last on the peer evaluations. I thank my lucky stars that I was not elected, because my ego might not be able to take a blow like that. How could anybody possibly receive an accurate peer evaluation at this point in the game? We’ve only been here for 2 ½ weeks. That’s not enough time to see who is going to make a good leader. I’m going to do my best to make sure that our new squad leaders stay here and stay motivated; the cadre don’t need any reasons to recycle people. Needless to say I’m not very impressed with their decision.

     After going to bed frustrated and defeated, I woke up sore and tired around 0430 in order to get ready for our second 5-mile foot march. The pace this morning was apparently quicker than the first march, but I survived! It’s incredibly empowering to overcome these physical obstacles. I’m amazed at what my body can do, and I’ve learned that the majority of the time, it’s my head that gives up before my body does. So if I can get in the right mindset, I can literally do anything as long as my body allows it. And trust me, I will push until my body gives out.

(blurry, but there's me, rucking in the background)

("hydrating" with my roommate Nicole (front left), and team leader Lacy (front right))

     We sat in the classroom for another seven hours today. Yep, leadership classes are THAT important to the military. In my opinion, leadership is not something you can learn in a classroom – it’s something you have to learn through experience. It’s just like you can’t teach infants how to walk by throwing a PowerPoint presentation at them. But hey, I didn’t win the last election, so I don’t get to make the decisions.

     Is that enough whining for one day? For your own sake, please hope that I have a better day tomorrow!

Week 2 - Saturday/Sunday

     Well, the last 2 days have been pretty uneventful. On Saturday morning, we did pyramid push-up drills. We did 3 sets of 10, then 1 set of 20, then 30, then 40, then back down to 10 again. My arms were shaking for the rest of the day! We also did some ab work which consisted of pyramid leg throws. After the company PT drills, my roommate Nicole and I walked over to the obstacle course and did some dips, pull-ups, and monkey bars. My hands are finally building some calluses so the bars don’t hurt as much. It’s worth having “man hands” at OCS!

     Saturday morning before lunch, my platoon went to the National Infantry Museum near the Fort Benning main gate. The building was gorgeous and the exhibits were extremely detailed and interesting. I just wish I had more time to walk around and read every single placard. Maybe on one of these weekends when we get a pass (which will probably be after graduation, haha), I’ll go check the museum out again. (http://www.nationalinfantrymuseum.com/)
     There were some Basic Training soldiers at the museum as well. It was so funny to see how they react to “superiors”. I had a group of them get out of my way and stand at parade rest, haha. I couldn’t help but laugh and tell them to relax – besides, I’m only about 8 weeks and a Bachelor’s degree ahead of them in training. However, they were allowed to buy soda and candy, while all the OCS Candidates were staring in jealousy. How fair and ridiculously ironic is that?!

     After the NIM, we were on study barracks/personal time until lights out. Today (Sunday), we got news to start personal time at 1100!! With that news plus the coffee & cake I had this morning, I’m a pretty happy camper.

     If anything exciting happens today, I’ll update, but for right now, I’m going to enjoy my personal time! Have a great day & hooah!